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Another reason may be that in the political climate of the gay and lesbian movement, with its heterosexualization of homosexuality in domesticity, domestic partnership, the language and imagery of marriage, family and equality—black gay men cannot be representative.By this I mean that when we think of the visual rhetoric of things like gay marriage, gay families and partnerships, the legacies of the endangered black man, the always already dysfunctional black family, these things disallow the articulation of gay black men, coupled or not, as the gay and lesbian neo-liberal norm.Things suddenly shifted inside my head, and I went from thinking I was straight to knowing I am gay.There was no other way to explain what I was feeling.Infidelity occurs in the context of both heterosexual and same-sex relationships, although expectations may be different.In either case, when expectations are violated, the wrongdoer will have to account for his behavior.

Part of the reason for this, as I mentioned earlier, is that two generations of black gay men, mine and the one before me, have been decimated by AIDS.

men are shacking up, getting married, and having kids.

I’m happy for you bro, but once everyone is coupled up… If you’ve been impacted by the brocession (that’s the technical term for the bro recession), you’re in luck!

Another reason for this decrease in visual presence may have to do with black men’s entrée into the men’s movement in the 90s, most representative in the Million Man March.

Sexual infidelity is often considered the ultimate betrayal. When a heterosexual couple experiences infidelity and the offense is committed with someone of the same sex, it turns worlds upside down. We expect that our partners will keep our interests in mind even when potential rewards tempt them to break the rules.

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